Taking Stock

The one aspect of my UBBT this year that has been constantly challenging me is my journal content. I have been publicly journaling every week since November 4, 2007. When I started my journal I was blogging for myself - venting and musing about things that weighed on my mind. When I was part of UBBT 6, our team completed the I Am Project that had directed journaling as part of our requirements. I found that process to be very stimulating and it took my journaling into a different direction. After completing UBBT 7 and UBBT 8, my journaling started to be directed more toward my students and my school. Today I find my journaling content alternating focus from my UBBT to my school and students, with less musing and venting. Venting is not as easy as it used to be without polarizing people. It seems no one really wants to open their minds to political or socio-economic views other than their own.

My training has been a bit of a dog show this year. I’ve had a couple of major physical setbacks that are making it difficult to push myself like I want to. I have an elbow issue that has been lingering from a rollerblading wipeout from July 2016. I finally had an ultrasound and x-ray that gave me a definitive diagnosis that does not make complete sense to me. The wipeout injured my elbow, the ultrasound and x-ray show inflammation that is being promoted by bone spurs. None of this surprised me except for what they say is the cause of my bone spurs - repetitive motion.  I have never heard of bone spurs being caused by soft tissue pulling on the bone repetitively. The repetitive motion I have going on in the elbow is the half million or so pushups I have completed over the past 10 years. Not too sure what I can do about this.

The more serious physical issue I have is my right knee. I have had five surgeries on my knees to date and the right one does not have a lot of cartilage left. I am definitely feeling it these past two years where it almost feels like bone on bone. No high impact techniques for that leg goes without saying. What is frustrating is that when I use my left leg, my right cannot support me without pain.

Setbacks and injuries are nothing new, nor unexpected. I just have to keep myself strong mentally and make sure I keep putting one foot in front of the other.

“"Maybe that's enlightenment enough: to know that there is no final resting place of the mind; no moment of smug clarity. Perhaps wisdom... is realizing how small I am, and unwise, and how far I have yet to go." - Anthony Bourdain (1956 - 2018)