Mistakes. I’ve made a few. Okay I’ve made a lot. While I am not proud of my mistakes I am content that I have made most of them honestly and without feelings of malice. I believe with all I am that beyond individuals with severe social disorders, this statement holds true for everyone. There are more evil acts in the world than there are evil people committing them because good people can make bad decisions without malicious intent.I have been struggling to mend some personal relationships that have gone horribly wrong over time. I am finding that there are so many dynamics at play that it can be difficult to find a common thread of shared perspective to build a foundation of understanding and forgiveness. I do know that if I am forgiving I also need to forget. It is difficult, if not impossible, to bury a grudge if one continues to hold another accountable for a misstep. It can be argued that forgetting can perpetuate a cycle that enables someone to continue to hurt you but at the same time the guilt that comes with a misdeed can become a cancer that consumes and destroys a relationship from within. At some point the slate must be wiped clean.
As the term implies, there is more than one person involved in any personal relationship and all involved must want to mend the relationship if success is to be achieved. If I want to create common ground so that reconciliation is possible, I need to be forgiving and I must continually remind myself that bad decisions and acts do not automatically translate as bad intent.
“Forgiveness means letting go of the past.” - Gerald Jampolsky
1 comment:
Did it strike anyone else almost immediately that Chinese character for forgiveness looks like a big smiley face? The character has several elements - a mouth - a woman - a heart, but when you just look at it without seeing the elements, it's a big smiley face.
Sifu Prince
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