At the beginning of the UBBT challenge I never really put a lot of thought into the 1000 acts of kindness requirement. I figured this one would kind of be self perpetuating and just a matter of logging the acts. However when one puts a little thought into it, the specifics of the requirement become a bit of a conundrum.The first snag one runs into is the definition of a kind act. Does it really count if it is something that I would have done anyway? Is it really a kind act worth documenting if I also benefit from it? First off, there are really few selfless acts. Everything I do for others tends to reciprocate back upon me. I can’t think of any kind thing that I have done for another that hasn’t given me a piece of my soul back. I definitely feel a lot better about myself and the world in general and my personal situation in life always benefits from helping others. I found myself asking that if I would have done the act anyway and it really isn’t a selfless act, what is the purpose of this test requirement?
One of the most difficult things to maintain in a hectic lifestyle is the mindfulness required to stay in the moment. So many of our actions and reactions are generated without a thought and without awareness. We can go through an entire week with little or no memory of the experiences of our routine days. These routines make it easy for us to keep our thoughts on the mistakes of our past and our concerns for the future rather than on the gift of the moment. Ironically one can really only utilize the experience of the past to shape the future if that experience is used in the here and now.
I have found by documenting my daily acts of kindness, no matter how insignificant, I am forced to stay in the moment and recognize my actions in their purest form. While documenting these acts may not give me any extra insight into myself, since we all tend to perform kind acts throughout our lives without thinking about them, the exercise of documenting them does bring me back to the moment. The real benefit I am finding from being in the moment is that not only am I forced to notice what I am doing to make a difference, I am now also noticing what I am not doing but could be doing. Self awareness definitely imposes a great sense of responsibility upon oneself.
Sometimes our inactions speak to the world louder than our actions and for that reason the acts of kindness requirement of the Ultimate Black Belt Test is, for me, the most defining characteristic of this entire project. It’s amazing what can evolve from one simple question.
“We have more possibilities available in each moment than we realize.”
Thich Nhat Hahn (b. 1926)
3 comments:
I've thought about this one a lot. It's easy enough to define kindness in it's simplest form - a smile, holding open a door, saying hi to a passerby, helping your nieghbour with her groceries - these are all kind things. These are all things that would make someone else's day a bit brighter.
It's the randomness part that throws me - I would do all of these things as it is, so they don't seem random.
Random seems like you would have to drive to Calgary on a whim, find a Starbucks and pay for someones "half decaffinated half-caf latte". See, that would be random.
Is kindness so rare that the simple things we do without thought are considered random?
It depends on what you think of as random. The pattern of living you have perhaps doesn't seem random because many of the same choices are habitual. Stepping back, looking at the affect on the other and self in a given situation perhaps is random because no two moments are ever the same, similar but never the same.
If you go to a certain store for a certain set of items, try finding another store for the same items and see if your mentality is the same for this place. Do you see or interact with the people the same? Do you see a pattern to your behaviour? Do you choose to have someone pull out in front of you on the highway? Many situations are random but the choices we make are usually habitual. I think it's interesting to take a look at the reprogramming of the habits or at least find that it's possible to change the way we behave simply by becoming aware of what we do and the options we have in any moment.
Just to be clear here guys, the requirement is not "random" acts of kindness. They definitely are not random and one must be in a mindful state when performing them. There is a definite difference.
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